A lot of guys, especially ones who are inexperienced in relationships, like to complain.
They think that by proving to their girlfriend how horrible of a person she is or how big of a mistake she made, that she’ll apologize and try and make amends.
But if we’ve learned anything, it’s that this scenario seldom occurs.
Why don’t girls just accept that they are inferior morons who should take our guidance for their own good?
It’s because of a simple psychological theory called “cognitive dissonance.”
Cognitive dissonance states that people have trouble holding two contradictory theories simultaneously.
So if you’re girlfriend does something like she flirts with another guy and you complain about it, she is NOT going to accept that she was wrong in doing it or that she’s a horrible girlfriend.
She WILL rationalize it to herself one way or another.
No matter how wrong her actions, she will find a way to rationalize it and make sense of it.
She won’t let it “contradict” with the type of person she is.
She will continue to think she’s right in whatever she’s doing, and she WILL find a way to rationalize any action that may prove otherwise.
And when she does, you’re the one who’s fucked.
If you complain that she’s being annoying, she’ll rationalize that you’re being too detached even if you aren’t at all.
If you complain that she’s hanging out with her ex too much, she’ll rationalize that you’re being too over protective or that her and her ex are good friends and that it’s ok.
If you have a girl who simply says “You’re right, I’m stupid and very sorry” then you must marry her. As soon as possible.
So now you can see why complaining about something she does will actually work AGAINST you.
If you convince her that she did something cruel and inhumane to you, she WILL rationalize it in her head.
And the easiest explanation is “I probably don’t like him as much as I thought.”
Complaining to a girl WILL drop her interest level.
Sometimes they’ll go as far as convincing themselves that they don’t actually love you.
You’ll notice this happens really often when chumps sense their girlfriend’s interest level dropping.
Instead of backing off, an AFC will pursue her even harder and complain about her not putting enough effort into the relationship.
The more he complains, the more the girl rationalizes that she must not love him anymore and that’s why she’s putting in less effort.
Girls can and will rationalize ANYTHING, from cheating on their husbands to the Holocaust.