Reader Comments:

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“My GF constantly pulls shit tests on me all the time, and uses threats against me. we go and get a new apartment and bills cant be made, and she poses the threat “if you don’t do this and this etc…, you don’t care about the relationship” and she constantly threatens to leave me. i have heard before, “call her bluff” but i am afraid to do so in the event she actually may leave me. we both have kids and her daughter is now very attached to me (i am the only father she has ever known) i have worked my tail off to try and get a job, with no luck, and she has not even slightly amounted to the effort in job searching that i have. she has resources to take her out to apply for jobs, and she does not utilize them. i don’t know what to do, maybe you should write an article on When to let her go”‍

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Note of special recognition: The subject’s girlfriend has recently achieved exalted membership at the LOEC (League of Extraordinary Cunts)‍

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If you take advice from any resident alpha male or any guy who has game, he’s going to tell you the same thing; “Cut your losses and move on, call her bluff, be a man.” Although this is the best advice you’ll ever receive, I for one understand how hard it can be to overcome your fear of loss (I’ve been guilty of taking back cheating girlfriends and trying to work through relationships I knew I shouldn’t be in).

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First, a maxim of interest. Conceding to your fears of loss for the purpose of basking in womb-like security is always worse FOR THE RELATIONSHIP than creating a Neural Swat team to exterminate your Oneitis with unholy retribution.

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To explain further, whenever you give in to being submissive in your relationship for the purpose of keeping your girlfriend happy, you decay the attraction she feels for you and end up making your relationship HARDER. The more you fail shit tests and apologize quickly because you don’t want to go through the sexual withdrawal that follows, the more you erode your girlfriend’s physical attraction for you. The more you beg her to stay with you, the more you DECREASE the chances she’ll stay with you. Relationships are often counter-intuitive

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Second, you are fucking up the cardinal rule of relationships heavily. In any relationship, whoever needs the other person LESS is the one with more power (from Rollo Tomassi). This dynamic is in play in every relationship, whether parent-child , boyfriend-girlfriend, boss-employee, or wife-husband. People ALWAYS underestimate the power of this rule and the extent to which it perturbs relationship dynamics. If ever you find yourself wondering why you can be so invested in a relationship while the other person barely seems to care, it’s because they are in a position of more power. Even the slightest imbalance of this dynamic yields DRASTIC differences. If you are in a position of less power, then take a moment to notice your amazing capacity to naturally conceive terror from the slightest disturbances (WTF, SHE’S TALKING TO THE MAIL MAN?!?!)

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In a healthy relationship, this dynamic will stay at 51-49 the guy. I e; it’s almost balanced but the girl needs the guy a little bit more. I’m not saying this because I’m a world-renowned misogynistic womanizer; I’m saying it because it’s true. In both fauna and postmodern society men are naturally meant to lead. Observe any relationship where the girl is TRULY in love and you will notice she naturally defers to her boyfriend’s SUBTLE dominance. Observe any relationship where the girlfriend is bored shitless and you will notice an imbalance (he needs her much more). Observe any relationship where the girl gets treated like shit and you’ll notice an imbalance the other way around (she really needs him).

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Note; provisional dependency has nothing to do with NEEDINESS. Imagine a relationship with a guy who’s a doctor and a single young mother who is unemployed. He pays all her bills, takes care of her, and acts as a provider chump. He is madly in love with her; she is aloof and indifferent and still harbors some feelings for her jerkish ex-boyfriend who is currently in jail for scamming. He texts her all day, she responds to half of them, they fight all the time because she “goes out to much” with her friends, and the guy displays a general trend of beta decline. Who needs who more? Technically the girl needs the guy more for purposes of resources, but EMOTIONALLY the guy needs the girl much more. As a result, she’ll pussy whip the shit out of him, extract all of his masculinity, and otherwise disintegrate his soul in the corrosive apparatus of feminine continuity.

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Would this girl be a bytch for cheating on him with an aloof Alpha she meets through on of her friends? No, she is simply following her instincts. She is doing what she was genetically programmed to do. Is she a bytch for emasculating this man and using him as a beta provider chump? No, it is more his fault for letting himself fall into a man-trap. She is simply following the evolutionary script made for all women.

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Finally, even if you DON’T let her go, you need to raise attraction in your relationship heavily. It doesn’t matter how you do it whether you go to the gym, make more money, have other girls like you, act aloof, or become a serial misogynist. Assume leadership; take what you want, and burn shit tests to the ground when you see them. Face your fears of loneliness and grief, a few months of sadness is better than a lifetime of regret. You are currently binding yourself to a lose-lose situation.

Either

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A. Your girlfriend will stay with you, but if you continue down this path, her attraction will be too low to maintain a happy relationship.

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B. Your girlfriend will cheat on you or dump you sometime in the future.

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